Best Bites on the Ohio River

From its mountains and plains to its big cities and small towns, the Ohio River was a strong contender for my favorite itinerary. There was also a semi-secret, but much more important, criteria crewmembers took into account when determining their favorites: access to restaurants. On a difficult cruise, the prospect of escaping for 30 minutes to order off a menu instead of standing in the galley buffet line could make all the difference. In this, too, the Ohio came through for us. Below, you'll find the meals, treats, and restaurants I looked forward to on every Ohio River run.

Big Boy Bread - Kirchhoff's Bakery - Paducah, KY

"Paducah Bread" has become something of a legend in our family. Officially known as Big Boy Bread, the loaves are a staple at Kirchhoff's Bakery, a family-owned establishment that has been feeding Paducah and its steamboat visitors for over 150 years. Although you can't go wrong with their cookies and pastries, it was the Big Boy Bread that I made a beeline for as soon as we were docked and my excursions were dispatched. Fluffy white bread with the teeniest, tiniest, blink-and-you'll-miss-it touch of sweetness, sometimes it was the driving force that got me through the notoriously long runs on the Ohio (and I may or may not have cried that time they ran out before we docked).

Derby Pie - Derby Cafe & Bourbon Bar - Louisville, KY

Only two desserts have been able to lead me astray from my lifelong aversion to nuts. Baklava is one of them; Derby Pie is the other. Maybe the atmosphere is to blame: Sitting at the Derby Cafe, just steps away from Churchill Downs, surrounded by horses and hats, it's easy to get caught up and feel like you've been transported to the famed first Saturday in May. Or maybe Derby Pie is just that good. Imagine vanilla-spiked pecans against a devilishly rich chocolate base, wrapped up in a flaky crust, and you might come close to imagining Derby Pie. For the full experience, make sure to also try a mint julep, the official drink of the Kentucky Derby.

Candy Cane - Doscher's Candies - Cincinnati, OH

The country's oldest candy cane manufacturer got its start in a small kitchen on the banks of the Ohio in 1871. Although the kitchen has grown significantly in the 150 years since, the recipe and technique have remained virtually the same: Doscher's still makes every candy cane by hand, meaning that each one is unique, from its red-and-white stripes to its hallmark twisted hook. Although they're almost too pretty to eat, once you bite into a candy cane (yes, bite), you'll find that the flavor is also unique: crunchier and chewier than their mass-produced counterparts, these candy canes have a tendency to trick you into eating an entire box. I may or may not be speaking from experience.

Tuscan Cheese Ravioli - Riverfront Bar & Grill - Marietta, OH

The best ravioli I ever ate was at a hotel bar in Marietta, Ohio. Located in The Lafayette, which proudly proclaims itself "a grand riverboat era hotel," the Riverfront Bar & Grill combines two of the things I love most: history and riverboats. From the tiny paddlewheelers stamped in the carpet to the elegant paneling on the ceiling, it's easy to get lost in the ambience and imagine you're back in the saloon of some steamship of old. I'm not sure what impelled me that day to turn from my usual Caesar salad in favor of the Tuscan Cheese Ravioli, but I think it might have been fate. Picture perfectly cooked pasta drenched in a rich cream sauce, nestled all in a row atop a bed of sauteed spinach — and it's right here, in a hotel in a little town on the banks of the Ohio.

Gob - multiple locations - Pittsburgh, PA

If you think you haven't heard of gobs before, it may be because everywhere except western Pennsylvania refers to them as whoopie pies. Having eaten both, I have to admit that the gobs have it. If you want to get technical, gob filling is historically cooked on a stovetop, while whoopie pies use marshmallow creme, but the premise is essentially the same: creamy filling sandwiched between cakey cookies. You'll find them in just about every bakery or grocery store in Pittsburgh, flavors often changing with the seasons: strawberry in spring, red velvet in winter, pumpkin in fall. My schedule unfortunately worked out so I was only able to have the latter once, but I still think about it a couple times a month.

Custom Burger - Burgatory - Pittsburgh, PA

There were a few restaurants that, no matter what chaos might have been unfolding, we simply had to visit every time we were in port. Burgatory was one of them. The type of place that's as much an experience as a restaurant, from the moment you step inside Burgatory, you're in Burgatory — from the fiery puns splashed across the walls to the made-to-order burgers held down with red trident toothpicks. And by made-to-order, they mean made-to-order: Diners have the option of filling out a checklist to build their own burger, mixing and matching everything from the bun to the meat to the seasoning that's on the meat. And that might not even be the best part. My sweet tooth may be biased, but the Burgatory milkshakes are easily some of the creamiest and most unique I've come across, with names like Campfire S'mores, Oreo Peanut Butter Pie, and Milk and Cereal, which, amazingly, tastes exactly like it sounds.